Confrontational stuff
I hate it when I hear somebody says something I have strong negative feelings about. I can't help myself, I have to respond. Nowadays, it seems to be more common to just nod along, avoid the confrontation and speak badly behind the persons back, but that's not me.
I respond. And I realise I am grabbing the shit and fling it at the fan while I'm doing it. And I know there will be no time to duck either. And I know people will be pointing in my direction when responsebility is to be taken. But I've learned to respect my feelings and part of that is not to ignore them.
I have no clue how that makes me look in the eyes of the person I'm confronting with my feelings or in the eyes of the bystanders. And to be honest, I'm affraid to find out. But still ... these are my feelings damnit, and they are important to me!
Now the big misconception about confrontations is that it's all or nothing: I like you vs. I hate you, you agree with me vs. I agree with you, you're a good person vs. you're a bad person. Confrontations are about differences, and differences are good. Yes, confrontations are uncomfortable, but we'll live .... yes, really, confrontations are survivable!
So there! And if you disagree .... well .... let me know! I'll live!
I respond. And I realise I am grabbing the shit and fling it at the fan while I'm doing it. And I know there will be no time to duck either. And I know people will be pointing in my direction when responsebility is to be taken. But I've learned to respect my feelings and part of that is not to ignore them.
I have no clue how that makes me look in the eyes of the person I'm confronting with my feelings or in the eyes of the bystanders. And to be honest, I'm affraid to find out. But still ... these are my feelings damnit, and they are important to me!
Now the big misconception about confrontations is that it's all or nothing: I like you vs. I hate you, you agree with me vs. I agree with you, you're a good person vs. you're a bad person. Confrontations are about differences, and differences are good. Yes, confrontations are uncomfortable, but we'll live .... yes, really, confrontations are survivable!
So there! And if you disagree .... well .... let me know! I'll live!
posted by DaDutchDude at 01:47
1 Comments:
Comments rock! Thank you!
You have a strong point and I'll certainly keep it in mind. What you, the causal (are you casual? For arguments sake, I'll just presume you are :P) reader, don't know is that I've just went through a huge transition in how I deal with my thoughts and emotions.
Before, I'd keep it all bottled up nicely and with no place to go, it would start to rot inside me. And I'll tell you, rotting emotions cause quite a bad smell ... with me, mostly in the form of passive agressivness. And no deodorant in the world can prevent other people of picking up on that ...
Now, whenever I beecome aware of a feeling, I try to deal with it, try to make it open, put it out there for the world to see how things make me feel. I am or try to be an open book. Does this make me vulnorable? Uhhuh! Does this sometimes make me very confrontational at times? Hell yes!
Do I want to change that? Well, no ... not right now anyway. I want to find a balance at some point in time, but right now, I need to prevent falling back into old habbits, perhaps at the cost of scaring some people away or at least making them feel uncomfortable from time to time. And people who care for me and themselves will tell me to shut up sometimes, and I will. I promiss!
Really, I'm just a cute and cuddly guy that's a bit strong willed and put his tact on ice ... for now. :)
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